Ensenada

Well, I did exert myself today. We actually did a mountain bike trip while the cruise was in Ensenada. We took a bus over to the Calafia Valley and were fitted with mountain bikes and gear. Then we took off with a small group of people and a few guides and rode up into the hills. It was damn hot! It was not true mountain biking. Some of the roads were paved. Even when unpaved, the path was wide and not too rocky. It was actually kind of fun because you could go very fast and the speed was exhilarating. I did really well until we were on our way back and I decided I was doing so well, I would take my camera out and take a few pictures…while biking…and once I realized that I was going a bit too fast and was approaching my husband too quickly and needed to brake. Unfortunately, with one hand on my camera and the other on the brake, I thoughtlessly hit the brake and only stopped the front tire. So I hit the ground pretty good and now have some nice road rash on my knee. In spite of this, I still had a great time.

Just Relaxing by the Pool

Well, so far have done little more than relax and eat. I have spent many hours next to the pool listening to books on my phone. I don’t feel guilty at all. Working to have fun on your vacation is highly over-rated!

Cruising...

Well, we leave on our cruise today. Carlos and I have our anniversary this week. Every year my goal is to schedule some getaway with my husband without kids (although I love my girls I value some adult time with my husband now and then). Every year I start to plan something early in the year that will be exciting and yet affordable. Every year I have a difficult time. This year was no exception. With no extra money at all, I finally realized that the only affordable alternative was the Baja cruise yet again. Therefore, that is why we are going on another 5-day cruise to Ensenada this week. Now don’t get me wrong, I actually kind of like this cruise. It is cheap and local. After we drive to the port, we just spend the next 5 days enjoying ourselves with no major decisions and no driving and all meals included.

Anyway, even though I have been on this cruise many times, I am so excited to spend the next 5 days relaxing with my husband.

Back from the Family Cruise

We had a fabulous time, but I want a relaxing vacation now just for me!! We did a short cruise to Mexico, with stops in San Diego, Catalina, and Ensenada. The girls loved it but I was kind of surprised that they loved the kid's program and wanted to spend more time there than with their parents! They even wanted to cut short any visits off the ship to return to the kid's program. I even was yelled at once for picking them up prior to closing!

Of course no cruise can start without the standard Muster drill (or the mustard drill as we call it). The girls may not look like they enjoyed it much, but believe me they flirted with all of the staff and the young women standing next to us the entire time.

I may have a few more photos from our room in my digital camera, but I had this one from my phone. needless to say the room was small. However, the girls did not seem to mind and loved the upper bunks (for playing primarily, because many nights we still ended up with extra visitors to the tiny lower bunks!

We ate every meal that was offered in the formal dining room (because mommy likes to be served) and the girls had a great time for every meal. Only one other family showed up each night at our large table and they had a boy and a girl around the same ages as our girls. Every night was a party. (Of course, I brought plenty of paper and crayons to pass any down time.

We skipped San Diego, but did take the boat over to Catalina. here are a few photos from the tender (unfortunately no one cooperated for the group photos). I know I have many more beautiful pictures on my digital camera of Catalina and hope to post some later once I actually upload those pictures!



Carlos and I spent every day at the pool, but the girls only agreed to come one time!!! the preferred to play in the kid's club!!!



One final shot is from our last dinner on the ship. Sofia was so tired from her week of fun she fell asleep on the table before dinner was served. the staff were so nice they made her a bed right at the table with two chairs and some extra linens.

Mammoth Memories...

Well we are back from Mammoth and pretty sad to be back to normal life. I never really aspired to live in an area up North with cold weather and snow, but I can now see why it appeals to many people. Mammoth was beautiful. Gorgeous mountains with so much untouched white snow and beautiful majestic trees.

The drive up was easier than I thought. All highway, no need for chains at all. No twisting mountain roads or carsickness! We found the condo easy enough and it was right by the main street of Mammoth. It was beautiful and pretty spacious. We got settled and did some shopping and spent the night in our temporary home.

Saturday, we spent the day playing in the snow. We found a big hill and did some sledding. We made a snow Shrek. We took a hike and explored the area. The girls had a blast!

Sunday was our ski day. It was chaotic but still lots of fun. The girls and I had an all day ski lesson and Carlos took off on his own to get in some quality ski time. I never really was able to see what Sofia's ski lesson was like since my lesson was held in a different location. However, I did run into Emma on one of my runs down the hill.

Monday, we had some adult time with some snowmobiling and I was a little terrified but it turned out to be fantastic. The scenery was gorgeous and speeding through the snow was exciting. I did need some time to warm up and I know Carlos was thinking, "How can she go so slow?"

Tuesday, we were supposed to go dog sledding, but the man who ran the dogsleds injured his back, so we ended up taking the girls out on the snowmobiles. It was clear that both my girls are built for speed. Neither had a bit of fear and both would have been happy to spend the day speeding through the snow.

Sadly, after our snowmobile adventure, we had to run back to the condo and pack up and head out of town back to home. Back to reality and laundry!

Why is it so hard to work after any time off?

Well, I am back at work today and finding it pretty difficult this week to be here. Even with only two days off from work it felt so good not to be responsible for anyone but myself for a few days. I am not sure I mentioned that I took my mom on a 3 day cruise to Ensenada for her birthday. It made me think alot about my relationship with my mom but i am not sure I am ready to post about those thoughts. I did miss my husband and my girls a lot, but I still enjoyed having no responsibilities beyond when to eat next!

Of course, this week I seem to be swamped at work so it just makes the contrast so much more dramatic. I am committed to keeping at this blog and not wimping out but I must admit i don't know what i even feel like writing about today. But i don't really want to bitch about work all the time. I like working. I like my job more days than I hate it. I am just tired of having it feel more important than the rest of my life and feeling like I have too little time to do anything well.

One thought I had was about marriage. I found myself thinking during my first weekend away from my husband that I can remember, that I missed him. Now this may not seem important. But, it makes me reflect on my feelings and I realize that I enjoy being with my husband. He really is my best friend. (I am not being sappy really, the crap is coming too.) I enjoy spending time with him. I can be a very impatient person and I notice I can get grumpy being with the same person for extended periods of time. They begin to annoy me. And it has little to do with anything wrong they do. I just can only tolerate so much one on one time with most people. I also like my solitude. But, I don't think I have ever felt this way about my husband. We have been married now for over 8 years and I still feel comfortable around him and enjoy being with him. This does not mean to say that he can't annoy me because believe me it does happen, but he does have to make an effort in some way to annoy me, like withdrawing, or talking down to me, just to name a few things.

Now the thing that is kind of bugging me is this sneaking suspicion that my husband does not feel the same way. I don't feel like he would rather spend time with me than any other person. Some days, I am not sure whether he likes me. Wow, I can't believe I wrote that. I think becoming a mother did change me in many fundamental ways. Some of which are for the better and I want to accept. Some changes which may not have been for the better and I am working on how to eliminate some of them or at least soften them so that they fit better with the me I want to be. Is it crazy to want your partner to accept you for who you are even if that person continues to change and develop? I guess i do not feel it is crazy but it may be unrealistic from time to time. I just feel overwhelmed so much more frequently than I ever have in my life and yet I feel many people, especially my husband, expect me to continue to manage everything and be the same person I used to be. I do feel it is my fault a good bit of the time. When you spend your life thinking you can strive for perfection and not letting people see the flaws, it is hard to blame others when they have a hard time coping with your incompetence. The new me has worked very hard to admit to herself and others that I am far from perfect and I can still be likeable and loveable. But what if people (especially my husband) do not like this new imperfect me? I know the healthy answer is that not everyone is going to like you and if you spend your life needing everyone to like you you are going to fail miserably. But I have to admit in spite of this I do want my husband to like me as much as I like him.

Dreaming of the Weekend

Well, having a mediocre day at best. The husband is still out of town for business but returns tonight!!! But we will be briefly passing as I leave tomorrow for my weekend with my mom! The girls are pretty good overall, but still fight going to sleep, so every night this week I have put them to bed only to have one or both cme downstairs 2 or 3 or 4 times delaying bedtime quite a bit. This of course makes them difficult to get up in the morning and being alone to round them up and drive to two schools, I have been late for work every day. And this is the worst time to be late with the big attendance and tardiness focus right now at work!!!

Anyway, made it to work just at the crack of 8:30 and rushed across campus to the staff meeting, only to have it not start for another 20 minutes! but still had to watch video and hear presentation about why you should come to work and never call in sick and be on time every day. Ugh. (Not to imply that I support using sick days to avoid work, but hey, why do they make the employees who do show up watch the videos and hear the lectures and condemnation. Kind of makes me want to call in sick once in a while rather than working through all my illnesses).

Anyway, dreaming of my weekend off which starts tomorrow. I am so boring. I plan to relax with my mom, sleep in, eat when i want, and read fluff! Nothing taxing at all after we check in!!! Can not really think of anything interesting to write at the moment, but hey at least I am writing something and that is a start. If anyone is reading this, you are forewarned that content will be sporadic!!!