The Facebook Generation

I have found myself being sucked into Facebook. Every day I make attempts to avoid going there, only to find I can't avoid it. Initially, I joined and then visited it rarely for more than a year. Then I discovered the Facebook application for my Treo and it slowly began to suck me in. Soon, I checked in at least once a day via my phone to see what my friends were saying in their status comments, to post pictures and see what my friends were posting, or just to share my own experiences. The tipping point for me appears to be the death of the dryer. The week I spent without the ability to do much laundry seemed to free up a lot of my evenings after the girls were in bed. I rediscovered my notebook computer and taking a lesson from my husband, began to play on my computer again right in front of the television. During this time, I realized that the real Facebook site is actually much more fun than my minimized phone version! My Facebook time severely increased and I find myself drawn to checking it multiple times per day.

Much of it is the social networking, but then there is that addictive game Mafia Wars. I need my fix daily and find myself returning again and again to do some criminal jobs, acquire dirty money, and fight other mafia families. Who knew the mafia life could be so fun or addictive? Well The Soprano's were a bit addictive too, but not quite as much fun with all the realistic violence and sex!

I find myself wondering how healthy my Facebook usage is. I have always had difficulty setting limits with my hobbies. I tend to obsessively pursue them and then finding myself quitting "cold turkey" to be able to attend back to "real life." I can read to obsession. I can watch television to obsession. I can play video games to obsession. Or I know I could and that is why I make sure that does not happen. Where does Facebook fit in this? Is it an escape to avoid the real world? Or is it truly a way to connect? I guess it really can be both. As with everything, it depends on how you use it. Do you use it to avoid having real relationships with people? Do you invest a lot of time and effort into people you are really not that close to?

I am not sure of my answers to these questions, although my gut feeling at the moment is that Facebook is kind of wonderful and is allowing me to grow in many ways. In a world where everyone is so busy and spread out, Facebook allows me to connect more with friends I truly miss but have no way to achieve face-to-face friendship due to geographical distance. It also allows me to connect more with friends who do live close by but are caught up in this day-to-day crazy experience of an over-scheduled life. It also allows me to explore the past a bit in many different ways. I can reconnect with friends from the past I lost touch with, or mere acquaintances from the past that I never took the time to explore, or even to approach people I may have made judgements about in high school and assumed would never have any interest in me.

Facebook is a social experience if you let it be. It is not easy and I still have to set my limits and continue to enjoy and live my non-virtual life. However, my goal is to truly connect with everyone I be-friend on Facebook. I vow not to friend someone blindly, but to make an effort to really connect with everyone. To post on their "wall," to comment on what they choose to share with the world, to learn more about everyone and to let them know who I really am. I vow not to be the person I have been for much of my life, afraid of being judged and therefore judging of others. Perhaps Facebook is one path towards my own self-discovery. We shall see.

What do you think about Facebook? Is it your friend or foe? Share a comment and let's discuss.